Jay Leno Arrested for Impersonating Pope

Jay Leno was arrested in Italy today after the host of the Tonight show sneaked into the Vatican in an attempt to take over the position of pope.

Pope Leno gets discovered in the Papal Chambers

Pope Leno gets discovered in the Papal Chambers

According to a statement released by Martin James Humphries, Leno’s lawyer, the talk show host claims that the Catholic Church is a joke, so they might as well appoint a comedian to take over as pope. “Who better than me,” wrote Leno in his statement. “I’ve got a big enough head. The pope’s mitre will suit me.”

The Vatican is reportedly appalled by Leno’s actions. “Pope Benedict XVI is still active pope until 28 February,” exclaimed Vuilemont Leguardo, a papal spokesman. “We can’t have someone simply barging in, taking over while Benedict is still active. It’s lunacy. Jay Leno will have to wait.”

Leno stated that his main motivation for wanting to take over the papacy is to ride the pope mobile. “You all know that he has a great interest in cars, and he’s got a considerable collection,” commented Humphries. “He would like to add the pope mobile to his inventory, and the only way he could do that is to become pope.”

To charges of trespassing and impersonating the pope, Leno pleaded not guilty. “I was not impersonating the pope. I was impersonating myself, being the pope,” he reportedly said. “And I wasn’t trespassing. God welcomed me into his palace, with arms wide open.”

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2 responses to “Jay Leno Arrested for Impersonating Pope

  1. Pingback: J.B. Smoove on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno - getmybuzzup·

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